Moving On...

By the time you read this, we would have already arrived at our next home: Singapore.  But right now, I’m writing this on our very last full day in Sri Lanka as residents.  I’ve never been this sad moving to a new place.  Before I left Manila, I have been living there for most of my life and itching to go because I have been missing my hubby terribly.  In Sri Lanka I feel we have just settled, we have just made it home then we leave.  Plus all the huge milestones in my adult life happened here!  Last Wednesday, the packing was done, the movers have pulled out our stuff and the shipment all set and ready to go, as I was watching our container van leave for the port, I felt like I was watching a funeral. 

Our life in Sri Lanka, all boxed up and it is over.  As I said in my Facebook update, I am beyond sad.

BUT in 10 days I will see that “box” again – in a different place with a new set of possibilities that lie ahead.  Exciting times are yet upon us again!  How can we be so lucky?

In my sadness there is also a lot of gratefulness – for the grace-filled almost 2-years in Sri Lanka.  I’ve never felt so blessed!  And I am hopeful that the gifts will overflow even to our next destination.  I have so many learnings – about myself, about living in a different country, about life in general – that I am just excited to unwrap and apply.  In the process there is always growth and the moves have “forced” me to grow up.

In as much as there is a deep sorrow beyond sadness, deep in my heart I also know and understand it is time to go.  I am feeling my feelings but I am also going with the flow.  And that’s the big lesson Sri Lanka has taught me.  Go with the flow and trust: Surrender, Discover, Create.

At the end of the day what matters most is that we’re doing this together – hubby, Luna and me.  And wherever in the world we may be, that is just where I want to be.

This blog will remain open to those who need information on life in Lanka and because I want it to forever live on.

But I will be moving on to a new platform of expression!

As most of you know, I have my own site myself!  For reflection and inspiration to cultivate vitality, check out www.talaocampo.com.

So as they say here: we’ll make a move and see you next in Singapore! 

As they say here too: I will go and come.  (I'll be baaaack!)

What Matters Most To Me In Sri Lanka: Wrap Up

So What Does Sri Lanka Mean / Matters Most To Me?

Marriage + Wife. 

Blank Page + White Space. 

Motherhood.

People + Connection. 

Create + Home. 

Through all these I learned to…

Surrender.

Discover.

Create.

And that there is no place like home.  

And you can create it.  

And you can have more than one.  Yay!

This is Livin’ La Vida Lanka.

Create + Home

The last (but not the least) thing that Sri Lanka means to me is Creating + Home.

I came to Sri Lanka excited to be married but with a two-year timeframe in mind.  It’s hard to dig a foundation for a home if you are only looking at it for the short-term, contingent on hubby’s assignment.

Sri Lanka is homey.  I think it’s the chillaxing vibe.  Or the surprising similarities with the Philippines.  Or the friendly people.  Or just being with hubby.  Whatever it is, it invited me to feel at home.  And I did.  I do. 

The regional HR head in my previous job flew in for a visit.  And he was asking me how I feel about being in Sri Lanka.  Sri Lanka was in a “state of war” for around 30 years which only ended around a year before we arrived.  So I guess the stigma that it is a war-torn country is still primary in people’s minds.  He was pretty much curious about how I feel safety wise.  Honestly I actually feel safer here than in Manila.  I was born and raised in Manila and paranoid to the core.  I know I can wing it in any country if I wanted to.  I didn’t need to do that here.  Even if trishaw/tuktuk/bajaj drivers still rip me off (as they do both foreigners and locals alike I suppose), I have trust in the people here.  Case in point, we had a workshop in a hotel around an hour away from Colombo.  As we were heading home, I realized I forgot my personal laptop in the meeting room!  It was already 2 hours since we finished and the butterflies in my stomach were really bouncing all over the place.  What do you know, it was still there and I got it back safe and sound.  In Manila, “sorry ka nalang.”  Anyway I digress.  So I just answered him, “to me, Sri Lanka is home.”

In as much as it was homey I didn’t find it “home” for a long time.  In my mind I was comparing it to Manila but more on what it lacked.  It didn’t have a “proper mall” and GASP, STARBUCKS.  Really on that point alone I think I have outdone myself.  A Starbucks addict.  I realized that what I was trying to do was I was trying to bring Manila to Sri Lanka so I can be “at home.” But as my father always tells me, “you have to appreciate it for its own charm.” 

And thank God I did.  And more.

I found out that I could be happy without a mall, without a Starbucks and yes, without wardrobe shopping.

It created a safe space for me to work out “issues / traumas” I left behind in Manila.

I found out that if I just let go, in the tiny teardrop country of Sri Lanka, a whole new world was opened up to me.

And I found out that yes, even if I am miles away from home, I can create a home.

And gain another home.

I am one of the lucky few.  Manila / Philippines is Home.  Colombo / Sri Lanka is Home.  And I have another chance to create another home in Singapore.

My brother and I were discussing.  He was sharing how, when he was studying in Melbourne he purposefully didn’t “make” it home.  And I guess that is where most of my regrets stemmed from.  I started out well but eventually all my issues came up, things got busy, pregnancy hormones raged.  Not a good combination when you want to set up a new home.  

But you know what, one fine day (as they would say here) It. Just. Did. 

People + Connection

The fourth thing that Sri Lanka means to me is about the people we've made connections with.

Our life in Sri Lanka wouldn’t be as beautiful and grace-filled as it is had it not been for the people we meet.

The first new friends I’ve made was in Sinhala Class.  Looking back at it now I’ve realized that in as much as we were of different nationalities, ages and what-nots – we have so many things in common.  Our love of Yoga, our love for our husbands (we’ve basically “followed” or “stayed” in Sri Lanka for them!) and our love for learning to name a few.

Office friends are essential.  My first office friends here were actually hubby’s team.  They welcomed me with open arms and are just authentically awesome people.  When I started working I got my own set of office friends too!  And they are as great!

One thing that I was actually wary of mingling with are Filipinos.  This is coming from a warning that Filipinos will just borrow money.  But I had a totally different experience here!  They did not borrow money at all but they are one of the most generous people I have ever met in my life.  I guess it’s the sense of solidarity and brotherhood for people from home in a land far away from home.  Or just the kinds of people they are.  They have gifted us with food, invited us to the parties and basically opened their arms and made Sri Lanka feel like Manila.  One thing about money though is that they are one set of uber entrepreneurs.  They make longganisa, siopao and even bring in Dunkin Donuts from the Middle East and sell it for a nice profit! 

During my pregnancy my doctor was a ray of sunshine and calling me “Sweetie” was pretty calming amidst the stresses of a first-time mom-to-be.  Our birthing class teacher was a source of strength and reassurance.  My yoga gurus gave powerful meditations. 

Closer to home, I feel we’ve developed a sense of family with our nanny and driver.  In as much as in this warped world they “serve” us, we have endeavored to serve them as well.  They are our parent’s age yet they work for us but I look at it this way, they take care of us.  This is the first time I’ve ever “managed” household “help” and I didn’t think I would be this sentimental about it.  I guess we were lucky to have found them.  Avid readers would know that I’ve had my fair share in driver troubles and cleaner woes.  But the two who are with us the longest and with us now are truly exceptional – not only in their work but also as persons.  As Nanny McVi once said, “I know you have a good heart.”

The place is just a place until it becomes rooted in the people there.  Nanny McVi was showing how sad she was on our leaving.  You see her expertise is taking care of children from 0-12.  By the time they celebrate their first birthday, she moves on to another newborn.  In as much as in each leaving there is sadness, with her “Sri Lankan” babies, she knows she can still see them.  But us, this may be a “real” goodbye.  I sure hope not.  And to go all MacArthur or Schwatzenegger, “We will be back.”  Or you will visit us in Singapore.  Or we’ll keep touch on Facebook!  Whatever mode - we'll definitely stay connected.

Motherhood

The third thing Sri Lanka means to me is Motherhood.

Maybe because I didn’t give birth in my own country makes where I did extra special. 

Getting pregnant and giving birth in a country where no family exists is tough. And first-time pregnancy and birth are milestones that are meant to be shared with the world!

I was depressed for most of my first trimester.  As regular readers would remember.  I hated where I was.  I longed for home.  Maybe it was because of the morning (all-day) sickness or the hormones.  Whatever the reason I was struggling with the fact that I was not in the Philippines.

As we went on with our pregnancy, I realized that it could actually be a good thing!

Not having food I craved for means I didn’t gain as much weight – in the end I still did but imagine if a Kare-Kare was within easy reach…

People also were more cautious to tell you what to do because aside from being “medical”, pregnancy and childbirth are very much culture-laden.

Because it was “just us” – we started off parenthood our way.  Luckily hubby and I are pretty much on the same page.

Aside from the benefits of “exclusion” at the end of the day we still shared the milestone with the world.

Thoughts and kind gifts found its way to us – from Australia, US and the Philippines.  With that I discovered how awesome the Sri Lankan Post System is!  And started to use the old school mail again.

I felt in as much as the family and friends I grew up with were not around, we gained more with friends who “took care of us” and treated us like family.  For that Pinoy friends are a must.  We were exposed to the utmost kindness from our kababayans (countrymen).  But not only them, all around kindness abound – especially if you’re pregnant!

In the end, My Team Luna was complete.  Hubby and I are together.  For him I would get pregnant and give birth anywhere.  But it was made even more complete, my mom by my side.  My mom for her and for what she stood for, my family and friends back home.

At the end of the day, Sri Lanka will always be special for making me a mom.  But really underneath that for making me grow up.

White Space + Blank Page

The second thing that matters most to me in Sri Lanka is being given a White Space + Blank Page.

I knew I needed to make new friends – so I enrolled in a Sinhala class and found my first dear friends and who are just awesome people.

I also wanted to deepen my Yoga practice and it just so happened that my first two Sinhala class friends, A and D were avid Yoga practitioners!  How cool is that?  I tried both their recommendations and found that what D referred was one that spoke to me more.

My Yoga gurus – the mother-and-daughter team of Nandini and Nitya of Aurora Yoga Studio is just awesome.  Nandini pushed me to achieve poses that I never even dared possible – all in the safe space that she created.  She was tough but kind.  I was practicing with Nitya most of the time because I did more Yoga when I got pregnant and after I gave birth.  She is an excellent Pre and Post Natal Yoga teacher.  I love the mini-meditation she facilitates: drawing prana and imagining it filling my tummy and enveloping Luna then in the womb with love and compassion. 

Sri Lanka provided me a white space, a blank page where nurtured passions that were just brewing back in Manila (Yoga) and expanded myself to really put myself out there and make new friends.  Something that I wouldn’t take the time to do in Manila because I was pretty much operating in my comfort zone.  Of course I would make friends when I attend a retreat or moved to a different company but that was facilitated by the situation itself.  Whereas here, I really had to think of opportunities where I can actually meet new friends!

More than that, what I thought I would just pick-up where I left off was career.  I am a person who anchors my identity on my career – for the longest time that was the center of most of the things I did in my life.  However when I came to Sri Lanka, I found out that it was actually difficult to get a work visa and there is actually a possibility of not getting one!

I took on the advice of my former boss to learn something in the event of not getting employed.  She suggested coaching.  And the rest was history.  That pretty much lead me to the next season of my life that beautifully aligns with my new role as a mother and a trailing spouse. 

Had it not been for Sri Lanka, I would have continued on to what was comfortable back home.  I’m sure I would still experience growth.  Because at the end of the day learning and progressing is all upto you.  But not all people are afforded this whiteness of a space and blankness of a page that most of the time comes with packing up your bags and starting a new in a new country or a new geographic location.

It has expanded me into a realm that I never would have dreamed of because I never knew it existed.  I have everything to thank Sri Lanka for that!

Marriage + Wife

What matters to me livin' la vida Lanka?  First, Marriage + Wife.

We got married at the time we did because of Sri Lanka.  My husband got an assignment here and wanted to take me along.  Of course my uber Catholic upbringing and principles required us to get married.  After 1 month and 9 days of preparation, we did.  Two weeks later my husband started his assignment.  A month (the longest month evah!) later I followed suit. 

At first I was excited, I’m going to be an expat’s wife!  How fabulous could that be?  Well apparently… not very.  A lot of people have this misconception of an expat life, especially an expat’s wife’s life.  What I can say is this, anything that takes you out of your comfort zone is disorienting.  For a control-freak like me, that is not fabulous at all.

But I digress.

Back to marriage and being a wife.

Starting our life in Sri Lanka pretty much gave me a Marriage + Wife 101. 

The things I firmly held onto in my life back in Manila, I left when I went to Sri Lanka.

I left my family and friends.

I left my job and source of income (which pretty much meant my independence as well).

I left my identity.

I vowed to my husband that I will go where he goes.  How romantic!  How adventurous!  It is!  Actually.  But not in the way I expected it to be.

Don’t get me wrong.  Being married to my husband is easy like a Sunday morning.  Living with him is a joy. 

I learned these lessons pretty much the hard way:

I learned that I do not operate as a “singular” entity anymore.  I have a partner.  And I allowed myself to depend on him.

I still have my family and friends, no matter where I am.  But what my family and friends offer me, my husband gives me too.  I let him be my family and friends and I became his family and friends too.

I learned that I am still me – even without the trappings of my “Manila” life.  That I am growing, changing and transforming not on my own anymore but we’re growing, changing and transforming together as husband and wife and as our individual identities.

At the end of the day I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.  Marriage and a start-up wife La Vida Lanka!

What Matters Most Livin La Vida Lanka?

It is confirmed.

It’s bye bye Lanka end of this month.  And hello Singapore.

It’s earlier than expected.

But for a very good reason.

Kudos to hubby for his promotion to the regional category team!

I’ve prayed to my dearest saints for this.

And he got it.

I am beyond proud!

But a part of me is in deep sorrow.

More like uber regretful.

I feel like I have not maximized my Lanka life.  I should have gone to more places.  Done more things.  Ate more of their food. 

I’m scared too.

Starting a new.  Leaving the home that we’ve built here. 

BUT, as the song in Rent The Musical goes “FORGET REGRET --- OR LIFE IS YOURS TO MISS… THERE’S NO DAY BUT TODAY."

So, instead of moping for not completing my List La Vida Lanka and this and that, I want to close off Livin’ La Vida Lanka – both the blog and the real life – the right way.

Darrah Parker in The Slice of Life Project taught me how to look at my life and see what really matters.  That plus a laser coaching session with ze Coachman Erich inspired me to use that perspective in “closing” our Lanka adventure.

So I invite you to join me in truly celebrating what matters most in Livin’ La Vida Lanka! 

I'm Back!

Good Morning Colombo!

After a semi-blogging hiatus, it’s home sweet La Lanka home! 

Did you miss me? 

I missed you! 

I promise to write a more substantial post but these things first: 

• Manila was Productive, wild and towards the end, got a bit tiring. 
• In as much as I’m still crazy busy, it’s still chillanka, you know, Chilla in Sri Lanka {a new term! love it!}. 
• It’s good to be back. I’m getting emo because I know our days are “numbered” here. Just when it’s definitely home. Oh well, our so-called-nomadic life. 

So, there. 

See you again in a bit!

A Slice of Our Lanka Life

It’s been a while since I last posted something!  It’s been crazy busy!  We’ve been on home leave since early this month.  Coming back to Manila after a year of being away we had to adjust a bit: to the pace, the number of people, cars and the craziness of it all!  Manila is wild.  And I am like a probinsyana lost in its concrete jungle!  After almost a month of this, I yearn for the quiet and solitude of our Colombo abode.  I miss our “own home.”  I miss our everyday routine.  Auntie Vimala.  Uncle Ajantha.  Our friends.  It’s weird, I am in Manila which has been home (and will forever be!) yet I’m homesick for Sri Lanka. 

So to quench my yearning, I would like to share with you photos of what a day is like in our La Lanka abode.  These were taken the day before we left and as part of the online photography course I’m taking.

When we first moved in, I didn't know what to do with our dining set.  It offended us aesthetically.  I didn't know it only takes changing the seat covers and it could actually be pretty!

I was fixing up the house one day when I decided to reorganize the living room.  I found this Balinese art matches our pillows!  

Laundry doesn't have to be a drag!  Splash some color in it!

One of Luna's favorite things to do: take a bath!

Her clothes take a bath too!  Here, hanging out to dry on our veranda.

What matters most.  Our daughter's happiness.  Can you see Auntie Vimala's happy too? Fun!

Note on the photos: The prompt was to go around each room of the house and basically capture what matters to you.  These are bits and pieces of it :-)

Good Morning Mr. Sun!

 

Five more months greeting Mr. Sun in this small sanctuary of a garden right where we live in Colombo.  It is an almost daily ritual: we send off hubby to work, we take one round in the compound, we go up to the second floor where this beautiful garden is for another one round then we go back up for a nap.

I wonder, where will we greet Mr. Sun in September?

Celebrity La Vida Lanka!

Hubby and I with Kumar and Yehali Sangakkara (middle in Anlene Green Top!) with the BBDO Team

Will livin’ la vida Lanka be complete without a celebrity encounter?  Of course not!  It’s actually a delayed kind of post as the encounter happened while I was still pregnant.  Anyway I had the wonderful opportunity to meet Sri Lankan Cricket hotshot Kumar Sangakarra and his lovely wife Yehali!  For the non-Cricket fans out there, I know what’s on your mind… “Kumar who?”  Well think Manny Pacquiao (sans the integrity issues) or David Beckham of Sri Lankan Cricket.  It may not be a very apt comparison but you get the drift, BIG SPORTS CELEBRITY!  Both are endorsers of hubby’s campaign so I had the “backstage” pass to TVC shoot and POSM photoshoot.

It is just amazing what a great couple Kumar and Yaheli are, moreover what great, authentic and grounded individuals they are! Aside from a Cricket star and his wife, both are actually trained Lawyers and principled people.  They are huge, even S, the Indian head of the advertising agency hubby is working with asked me, “do you realize how big he (Kumar) is?”  Yet they don’t have a trace of “celebrity status” – they are very easy-going during the very hot shoot, I am even surprised that they don’t have P.A.’s following them about and what not.  C, the Account Director even mentioned that she actually experienced handling unknown Indian* talents who are divas more than these actual celebrities.  Moreover you know they’re real when they remember your names and greet you when they see you again, like a month after!  Pretty awesome.

It’s not on my list to have a close encounter with Sri Lankan celebrities because I never thought that would happen!  That really exceeded my expectations!  A big check!

*Apparently Sri Lankan talents do not abound so they usually fly over Indian talents and directors (!) for TVCs!  Crazy right?  If I only have a more South Asian look, I will apply!  Hahaha!

The 2 O' Clock Traffic

This is how Havelock Road looks like at around 2pm from our balcony.  Compared to Manila traffic it’s nothing but this is quite busy already in Colombo.  It’s dismissal time in school and lunch time for most.  Yes you read it right, they eat lunch when we’re almost ready to take merienda.  

I can’t believe we only have 6 months to take in this view.  It makes me overly sentimental.  If you read my first few posts and my latest ones, you know I’ve come a long way through.  I am no longer that newly-wed, anxious about not having work but embracing the housewife world girl who came here in 2010.  Around this time (2pm) at the last quarter of 2010, I would probably be coming home from Sinhala class, or occasionally having lunch with Sinhala classmates or going out to buy groceries or taking a nap (back then I re-discovered the pleasures of siesta).  In 2011, I probably am one of the few who are working in the office as most of them are in the canteen having lunch or waiting for my next meeting which will be after officemates come back for lunch.  Today, I’m usually at home taking my nap as it’s Luna’s sleepytime too (needless to say, I’ve re-discovered once again the power of the afternoon nap) or blogging, or reading, or even cooking or more like prepping what hubby will cook (you gotta work with the “free” time you have, i.e. Luna’s sleepy time).  

Since moving to Sri Lanka, my 2pm have been so totally different from 2010, 2011 and 2012.  I wonder what my 2pm will be like by the last quarter of this year.  Where will we be then? 

2011 La Vida Lanka

2011 is the first (and probably only) full year we have spent Livin’ La Vida Lanka.  We touched down in 2010 (August for Hubby and October for me) and will be taking off as per contract by August of 2012.  As we reach the end of the year, I can’t help but reflect on my 2011 La Lanka experience.  Let me share with you my 11 of 2011 Livin’ La Vida Lanka:

#1

It was the year of discovering more of Sri Lanka.  We went to Kalpitiya and played with the dolphins.  We took an uber luxurious retreat in the heart of the tea country at the Tea Trails.  We visited friends in Kandy.  Had a feel for hubby’s Antipolo home in Matugama.  We planned more but pregnancy kept me at bay in Colombo.

#2

It was a year of working La Vida Lanka!  It was a major learning experience – working in the biggest FMCG in the country, dealing with the corporate culture of a high-performing organization, adapting to the unique Sri Lankan culture at work, meeting new people and making lifelong friends.

#3

It was a year of longing for home and struggling with where we are.  Blame it on the pregnancy hormones?  I didn’t have specific cravings but I craved in general to be back home.  Back to the comforts of family, friends and Filipino food.  I hated where I was – but realized that where I was didn’t matter as long as I hubby and I (and little Luna in my belly) were together.

#4

It was a year of finding home away from home.  We discovered Kabayan, the Filipino restaurant and AFSRIL, the Filipino community in Sri Lanka.  It was fantastic meeting our kababayans here – in a country seemingly so far away from home.  And we were lucky to meet really wonderful people who gave us a sense of community and family when we most needed it.

#5

It was a year of celebrating our first year of marriage!  We had an 11^th month celebration in Singapore and on the day itself, a fantastic dinner at our favorite Chesa Swiss.

#6

It was a year of pregnancy away from home.  Being pregnant for the first time is one heck of a learning experience – more so if you’re kind of striking it “on your own.”  Of course for us, it was us – hubby and I.  We have met wonderful people who supported us in our journey like Dr. Kamanie and Ms. Mohanie.  It was also a discovery of the city and its nooks and crannies of baby shops. I also couldn’t be more thankful for my mother friends who have been a source of virtual support – from maternity fashion to lactation consultation!  Pregnancy away from home – it is ok as my friend G said. 

#7

It was the year of the comeback of the post-office.  For gifts from down under from Tita A and the Filmmaker bro, to purchases from Amazon and the Philippines and gifts from friends back home.  They do find a way to La Lanka in one neat piece!  Moreover the thought finds its way in our heart.

#8

It was the year of friends and family visiting.  I’m so glad my Mentor K came for a business trip and spent the weekend with us (albeit it was the height of my morning sickness!).  I couldn’t be more thankful for my mom who came for Baby L’s delivery.  Her presence is invaluable.  More workmates from Manila found their way here for a business trip as well and it’s nice to catch up with the chismis (gossip).

#9

It was the year of pushing for my coaching studies.  I enrolled in International Coach Academy and after a few struggles balancing it with work this early year, I was able to gain footing and finished most of my coursework.  Poised to graduate next year!

#10

It was my 30th year.  It was bittersweet because for a milestone year I was away from my 3 F’s (family, friends and Filipino food!) but it was the time I fully embraced where I am – my life in La Lanka, the friends I have made here and how happy I am for all those.

#11

It was the year I met Luna, became a mom and a parent with hubby.  For that, Sri Lanka will forever be special.  In as much as my pregnancy hormones made me “hate” it, our daughter’s birth made me love it.  I remember what mymommyology once said about Chapel Hill – it was the place where discovered how it is being a mom and being a mom there is all she knows.  And she will definitely cry the day she leaves Chapel Hill.  My sentiments exactly. 

For more than a year we’ve been here, Colombo has transformed me in many ways I never thought possible.  It is the place where I truly grew up.  The place where I truly became a wife.  The place where I became a mother.  The place where I have become who I am now.  The day we leave Colombo, I definitely will cry because so much of me now has been formed here and I know I will also be leaving a piece of myself behind.  But that is still a long time away!  And there is still so much of the country and me to explore.  Here’s to 2011 and to 8 more months in 2012 La Vida Lanka!   

Working La Vida Lanka

One of the things last year that was a source of anxiety for me was if I will be able to work in Sri Lanka.  The thought of being “stuck” at home was scary – even if I have wanted to be an “expat’s wife” I didn’t really think much of being a housewife.  But my 3 months of being a housewife was quite blissful!  I was able to continue learning and expand my network of friends, not only in Sri Lanka but all over the world!  I attended Sinhala class here and enrolled in a Certified Professional Coach Program which I do online.  I delved deeper into yoga.  I got a lot of rest and was able to make a simple home for hubby and myself.

At the start of the year however, after getting my much needed rest, I was lucky enough to be granted a work visa.  You see it’s quite difficult to get one especially for someone in my field.  So a new life started for me in Sri Lanka’s biggest FMCG company (which is where hubby works as well).  So what did I learn from the experience?

• Culturally there are many adjustments you really have to make – I have worked in the Philippine office of the same company for most of my working life and in as much as it is the same organization, the organizational culture is very different.  Which I believe is driven by the local / country culture as well.  How is it different from the Philippines?
• When it comes to gatherings (townhall, meetings, etc.) they are really very serious.  It is so quiet that you can even hear a pin drop.  For us Pinoys, we can’t help but talk to our seatmates, right?
• Related to that – things presented in a serious manner is taken seriously as well.  If not, it will not be perceived seriously.  Whereas in the Philippines, if you give it some comedic twists here and there – you will still be taken seriously and the audience will appreciate you keeping them awake.
• They are still very rooted in tradition – in a sense that for example for field jobs, these are mostly occupied by males.  Not for any reason but because ladies won’t be “allowed” by their parents / family to have that kind of role.  In the Philippines, we have a lot of female field employees. 

• It is such a different experience working in the biggest company in town!  They are the biggest FMCG company for a reason. 
• The standards are just world-class.  I came to the plant in 2008 as part of a conference agenda (even before we moved here) and I was impressed that their plant was very similar to the one we visited in New Zealand.  As the company values Health and Safety, the H&S score for our plant in Sri Lanka is even THE BEST in the company’s GLOBAL collection of manufacturing facility for the number of employees it has (which is around 400!). 
• The way people work or people’s attitude to work is also exemplary.  We have a value of “Make it Happen” and truly the team makes everything happen!  Even the seemingly impossible.  The driver is pure passion and the belief that there is no option than to make it happen. 
• At the end of the day, it is really exemplary leadership that steers this organization to unprecedented growth.  The strategy is clear and very attuned to the dynamics of doing this kind of business in La Lanka.  The ambitiousness is also there – which permeates to the other levels of leadership in the organization. 

• People make the difference.  I have met the most amazing bunch of people from all over the organization.  Amazing in the way they work, but more so for the persons they are.  I am lucky to be part of such a team where I can be myself (even if I’m the “foreign lady”) and feel at home.  In as much as we’re different in beliefs, nationality, looks and what not, I’ve felt more similar to them than different.  And I will treasure forever their friendship.

Yesterday, that phase ended.  I am now into the final stages of my pregnancy.  It is bitter-sweet.  After almost a year, I have grown to love this workplace.  But for our circumstances here and the thought of giving the best possible care for our baby, I will not go back after my “maternity leave.”  I am excited for what is to come next, our baby!  Career-wise, I’m also going through something a lot different – more on this later!  As a friend said, exciting times are ahead.  But for a moment there, I would just like to stay with this feeling, this experience of Working La Vida Lanka.   

Treats from Down Under!

What I’ve experienced living in Sri Lanka is my world expanding and also getting more connected.  The proverbial e-mail, Facebook and Skype have helped made this big world more accessible but so has the good old registered mail. 

You’ll just get surprised what you get in the mail really. 

One day I got maternity treats from Tita A from Australia!  Belly Belts and Bando are life savers for a growing belly and a shrinking budget?  Haha!

More goodies from Tita A came!  This time for baby – some funky dresses care of baby’s Tita C and one of the most high-tech thermometers I’ve ever seen. 

For the goodies – Thank You, Thank You, Thank You!!!

What do you know, you get something else.  A nice Gustav Klimt postcard from baby’s Ninong A, my brother the Film Maker. 

In this day and age of technological breakthroughs, don’t discount what you get from the old school registered mail.  Because it just might be what you need, wrapped in love!

Help Management 101 La Vida Lanka!

photo borrowed from activerain.com

After my post on Help La Vida Lanka, an e-mail comment from my mom and a discussion with Diplo Wife, I decided to write about a few learnings from this experience.  As I previously mentioned, help management is an area I am not accustomed to.  Leave that for the “adults” to handle!  And now that I am one of the adults in our home, then this is now one of my responsibilities.  As I am just a novice at help management, I had to go through the learning curve the hard way.  Here are some of the initial learnings I have and I hope it will help you, my dear readers in some way:

1)   Be thankful for help!  I know that when you take a cross-section of the world, not even half of the households would be in a position to hire help – whether full-time or part-time for that matter.  Especially in countries where help is expensive or even looked down upon, managing a home is more challenging.  Of course there are trade-offs (more technology to help you around the house like dishwasher, etc.), having help (the right one for that matter) is still a big convenience.  People say “can’t live without them, can’t live with them” – at least for now, with a growing family, I would rather make it work to “live with them.”

2)   They need constant monitoring and management.  It doesn’t mean that when the orientation phase is over, they will work like a well-oiled machine from then on.  They need constant guidance especially for things that are new (such as my new yoga pants).  Be directive if you must because most of them really do need to be given specific and direct instructions.  My mom said not to give them the space for initiative or even to think for themselves – at least not when they have not yet proven that they can.  I mean even at the workplace we don’t give too many decision-making responsibilities to fresh graduates or new employees in certain levels unless they have proven that they can.  To do that constant monitoring and management, you have to have an opportunity to observe them in action.  I went into this set-up because I would rather do something else (like work of course!) so the cleaner was left with a list of things to do as our constant interaction.  She would then “write back” with the list of things for me to buy (cleaning items that have run out).  But it doesn’t work that way.  Virtual reporting relationships doesn’t work with home cleaning.  So I had to make sure that we at least have a day where I am home and can give her direct instructions / corrections, etc.

3)   Recognition is also vital.  I make it a point to reinforce the things that they were able to do well – as immediately as I can.  I’m a bit particular with the cleanliness in the car and asked my driver to clean the trunk.  Once, when I opened it and I was actually surprised it was sooo clean!  I immediately praised him and the smile on his face was just indescribable.

4)   I also saw my mom taking care of our help especially when they are sick.  First, we give them medicine.  At least the first aid kind.  Second, we actually encourage them to rest when they are sick.  One so they could recuperate easily and two so they also won’t spread the virus! At least the “salaried” ones (e.g. driver), when he calls sick, we give that as “paid leave.”  Third, we also try to give them freebies.  When I was in Manila, I used to get free product allocation from the company I worked for.  Some of it we share with our help and even with the guards in our village.  Now, I don’t have freebies but we can get discounted products and we take advantage of that.  On a regular basis we give our help bulk powder and when there are special products on sale, we share the blessing too with people in our condo – security guards and building office folks.  These small things really go a long way – they see you’re taking care of them, and they will also “take care” of you too. 

5)   Things will not flow smoothly all the time.  No matter how you’ve established rules and routines and whatnots, sometimes things will really just get lost in translation, or people will falter (both you and them!).  In times like those, depending on the situation of course but for those that fall under the “normal” range, take it with a grain of salt, correct immediately or apologize immediately as well, sometimes you just have to bite the bullet and charge it to experience and take time out to reflect on the experience – what went wrong, why, how could it not happen again and what was your contribution to the situation.

6)   Hire for “aura” as well.  Now I understand why my mom doesn’t like it when our help is always frowning.  “Bawal ang nakasimangot dito” (frowning is prohibited here) would be an apt slogan in our house.  You don’t want any negativity in your home right?  Trust your instincts when hiring help – in as much as they are capable, since it’s a very personal relationship, it should feel right as well.

7)   Adjust to their strengths and weaknesses too.  Let me borrow another cliché, “nobody is perfect.”  But you have to work with what they are good at and adjust your expectations on what they are weak on.  It saves you the frustration and gets you the results in the end.  I know one of our drivers really move slow (as in drives slowly, etc.) so I always tell him what time I need to get to this place and what is the importance of getting there on time.  I find him adjusting and exerting effort.  When he gets us there (alive) and on time, I refer to #3 and praise him.     

So what happened after Help La Vida Lanka?  Well, it did not work with our cleaner.  She was failing not only on the yoga pants front but in many aspects as well.  I did ask her to pay but she kind of went AWOL after that so I guess good riddance.  Based on #6, her “aura’s” kind of negative and I wouldn’t want her to be around my baby if she’s like that.  Her negativity was what was affecting her work as well and I guess it was all for the best.  I was able to find another maid right away.  She’s awesome.  Not perfect but a lot better than the last and I always make it a point to apply the above learnings in “managing” her.  She has a nice aura as well – very positive and works well.  However she got sick (she had a heart surgery before) and now I’m back on the hunt!  Our drivers are both quite stable.  Both are competent and are doing their jobs well.  When I stop work, one will take on another role (naks!) in a government agency that pays well.  Good for him!

The chapter on help is not yet over for me (more on this later!).  But I hope my humble learnings will help you dear readers in Help Management 101!